You know that feeling?
Where you’re in the middle of a party, or next to a bunch of people on the bus, but you can’t help but feel incredibly lonely?
Or you’re talking to a friend.
Maybe you’re texting them or maybe you’re walking to class. Maybe you’ve known each other for years. Maybe you just met a few weeks ago and *clicked*.
You share something with this friend. You feel bad about it.
You start feeling like a burden.
I’ve been thinking about that a lot lately. How we so often want to be there for everyone else, but when we need people ourselves we start feeling like we’re a burden. Why is it that we think others deserve our support but we feel bad asking for support in return?
I think that burdens don’t know that they’re burdens.
I’ll let you in on a little secret: needing people does not mean you’re a burden.
It makes you human.
I think that as long as we are trying to take care of ourselves, and doing our best, we aren’t being “too much” for others. And, at the end of the day, it’s not on us to protect everyone else.
One of my friends told me, when I worked for her years ago, that it’s other peoples’ responsibility to advocate for themselves and tell you what their boundaries are.
We get so caught up in imagining crossing others’ boundaries that it makes things a whole lot harder for us and for them.
So basically, we get it.
We all get it.
We all understand the feeling of being a burden, and feeling like we aren’t good enough.
We all know what it’s like to send that “I’m sorry to bother you” text or that apologetic email. But don’t apologize for being. You are not a burden.
You are not a burden.